DOA: XBOX360

It's Christmas Eve, and most of Japan doesn't care. Christmas here is not about gifts and family, it's about going on a date. That's not to say there aren't crowds at the shops, just not much more than usual. And as a gamer, I know the true meaning of Christmas: holiday launches.

When a game company wants to launch a new product, t'is the season. They know the holiday shopping rush will push opening sales and get them back into the black. After all, it's pretty expensive to bring change into the market. This was Microsoft's strategy with the XBOX360, beat their competitors by releasing early and during the holidays. And it worked great in the west, they can't pump out the machines fast enough.

Over here, however, things aren't as rosy. First of all, the Japanese never liked the original XBOX. This picture was taken a bit more than a year ago, when the system was in full force back home. That's a core system plus four games, and not some junk discount bin games either - Halo, PGR 2, Blinx 2, and Top Spin. A set like that would have sold for maybe $400 or more at the time, but the price there is 20,000 yen, about $200. Even at that steal of a deal, it still didn't sell. They offered that package for months and no one bought it.

Just last week the XBOX360 was released. There was some big opening day party held in Tokyo, but not quite the grand spectacle of the American debut. In the west, the system sold out instantly, with or without promotional events. After the Tokyo show, there were still plenty of systems available and by the end of the day they'd only managed to sell about 40% of thier stock (so I've read online). Very bad sign for Microsoft. I took this picture about a day or two after the Japanese release. Plenty of systems in stock, and there's even a used one for sale. That's either a demo unit, or someone bought one and returned it the very next day.

So how do I feel about the 360? I couldn't care less. The XBOX has always been the machine made for the American idiot. It's a big, powerful technology showcase with few innovative titles and focused too heavily on the action, racing, and sports genres. Not to say that all XBOX games are bad - DOA and Halo are certainly tops in my books - but there's just not that much in the way of variety or exclusive games. To crack the Japanese market (as far as I can see), Microsoft is going to have to do a lot more for RPG'ers (Fable doesn't count) and dating gamers (they're popular over here), encourage the development of unique and original games, as well as secure XBOX360-only games from well-known developers. They'll also have to prove they're Japanese, which may cost a little more than Mr. Gates is willing to spend.

Hong Kong, Fuck Yeah!

We're here to have a motherfuckin' good time!

That was pretty much the theme for last weekend's trip to Hong Kong, as my friends and I were constantly singing the Team America song. Great movie, and a great little vacation.

Where do I start with my whirlwind city tour? The first thing you'd notice when you leave the airport and pull into the city is that it's big. I mean, really, really big. I've never seen so many skyscrapers in one city. My guides were saying that since the city is so small but growing so rapidly, new building laws hold that construction must maximize land use. So now, the minimum height for new buildings is something like twenty stories and they have to be built in groups. When you drive around, you see clusters of identical towers crowding around the bay and climbing up cliffs. It's amazing to see a twenty-plus story skycraper on the water, and behind it, another one on the mountain above. They also use bamboo scaffolding on everything, which seems so outdated with modern building techniques.

I went with my friends from capoeria. My instructor, Simon (Espeto), is on a tourist visa, so he has to leave the country every 3 months. My other instructor, Casulo, just wanted to take a vacation. We stayed with Daniel (Chumbinho) who runs capoeira classes in the city. Simon is a stuntman and runs the gym here in Osaka, called Powerarts. While in Hong Kong, he put together a Powerarts stunt workshop which I helped/participated in.

The students in Hong Kong were all very friendly and fun. They took us out every night and hung out with us during the day. I was suprised how many of them spoke English, even though it was a former British colony. A few of them have visited Japan and hopefully more will come out here soon.

Most of the trip was spent gorging myself on the local cuisine. Eating tons of Chinese food was half the reason I went there in the first place. It was indeed good. I ate duck every chance I got, dug into a wide variety of dim sum, and tried as many different kinds of noodles as I could. I think I ended up in a restaurant at least 4 times a day. And it was no problem since I was doing fitness classes and walking the rest of the time.

An interesting note, while we were there, the World Trade Organization was meeting. This group is not very popular, it seems. As such, the city was in riot-ready mode. Emergency vehicles were equipped with window screens and transportation and nightlife were occasionally restricted. We weren't in the vicinity of the protests, but I tried to get someone to take me to that side of town.

So Hong Kong was great and I hope I can make it back soon. There's already talk of opening another Powerarts gym there in a few years. It seems that for a city of about 6 million people, which produces some of the best action films in the world, there's only one place to go for gymnastics. Since my buddies here specialize in gymnastics and stunts, it seems like a natural direction. I'm hoping to go along for the ride.

24 Hours Over Osaka

It's been quite a day. Just 24 hours ago I was in club Pure, watching a bondage show. I've seen that kinda stuff on the 'Net for years, but never watched a live performance. It was pretty interesting, although I did feel a bit lecherous. Then again, it was nothing worse than hitting up a strip club back home. And there were a lot more women at this "event" than I've ever seen in a stripper bar (excluding the dancers).

Anyway, they did some funny stuff. It started with some girl doing a strip tease from a kimono. That definitely takes skill; kimonos are really complex pieces of clothing and it can take hours to get properly dressed in one. So she probably had a custom stripper kimono, but it was still obviously a big undertaking on her part.

After the kimono girl was the bondage and S&M show. Three women came out on stage: the dominatrix, the candle girl, and the recipient. The dominatrix and the candle girl were in some loose robes, and the other girl was in a kinda straight jacket or something. They did some rope tying, wax dripping, and caning while dancing. The thing with Japanese bondage is that instead of whips and chains, they like to tie really complex knots all over the person. It ends up looking like a cargo net, but it forces the recipient into any position the tyer wants. There's really an art to it, and a they make tons of porn with people tied up in all sorts of crazy poses.

They ended the show with a little audience participation. First they pulled a bunch of people up on stage and half-ass tied them up so they could pose for pictures. Then they had some tattoo artists come up and draw on the bare chests of any women that felt like it. Nothing too crazy there, but some cool designs; one had a school girl uniform drawn on her.

I ended up home and in bed around 3am. A little later than I would have liked, as I had to work today. It's just a temporary job today and next Thursday, but it's pretty good money. Luckily, it turned out to be really easy. I had to be there by 10, so that meant getting up at 8 and riding the train for about 30 mins. They were a little shaky on the directions and I was almost late. They were also weak on lesson plans, so I was pretty much stumbling through all the lessons, asking the teacher's aid what to do. Despite this first-day syndrome, I had a really great time. The kids were amazing, much better than at NOVA. If I can always have kids like that, I never want to work with adults again. They were a blast.

The day ended with an hour train ride all the way across the city to Cosmosquare and Zepp Osaka. The Pixies were playing, and my student bought me a ticket. Rock! Now, I've only been a Pixies fan for maybe 3 or 4 years; I didn't listen to them on their first run. I got turned on to them with '80's nights back in university and can scream pretty much any of their songs out of tune while drinking. Since they broke up in the early '90's, I figured I'd never get to see them and would just have to settle with the bar scene. What I'm getting at is that I was totally psyched up about this show. Let me tell you, they did not disappoint. Seriously, this was one of the best shows I've ever been to. They burned through the set, practically non-stop. They played everything I wanted to hear, save Velouria. Great energy, pacing, stage set-up, presence, everything. It was a little obvious that Frank Black was in control, as the vendors had plenty of his solo efforts, but nothing from the Breeders. The crowd also seemed to respond to Gigantic a little more than Frank would have liked. Hopefully they won't let it break them up again, since the Pixies are without a doubt one of the best bands in existence.

Like all concerts in Japan, it started at 7 on the dot and concluded with one encore precisely at 8:30, at which point everyone was kicked out in an orderly fashion. That put me back home by 9:30, where I decided I was too tired to try going back out, even though it meant not possibly meeting the band. So I updated!

Action Figures!

Back in high school, I had a part-time job at Toys 'R Us. This was a great job for me. The pay sucked, I got yelled at a lot, it was both tedious and strenuous. I loved it because I had first dibs on whatever action figures and video games were in the store, and I had occasion to fill peoples' ears with my passion for said goods. It was a place I would hang around in my free time anyway.

Coming to Japan is a continuation of my romance with video games and action figures. This is my Mecca. And so, as I drift from toy store to game shop, I am keenly aware of interesting, rare, or just plain strange collectibles on the table.

That's where these gems come in. I came across them in a toy store in Den Den Town - the electronics district - which is full of game, toy, computer, and electronics shops. It was a bit more like a museum than a retail outlet, as all the figures were posed in secure glass cases. That is, of course, with good reason; the toys here are well into the hundreds of dollars. An astute eye may notice that the girls are naked and in erotic poses. Look a little closer and note that their crotches are discretely covered with little strips of tape. This is a classic example of Japan's bizarre censorship policies. Breasts, tentacle penises, rape, bodily fluids - A-OK! But no genitals; they have to be poorly blurred or slightly obscured in some way.

People gave me lots of flak for my amassing of action figures. It certainly wasn't the chick magnet I'd hoped it would be. I can only imagine how awkward it would be to try explaining this stuff to friends/family/dates: "I like Street Fighter 2, so I thought it would be cool to own a spread-eagle Chun-Li. It was only $150!" And nothing says "not misogynistic" like a statue of the Grim Reaper raping some girl. Of course, these guys are probably pretty date-less, much like me in my collecting heyday. So maybe no social harm done.

This last one is a little different. It's not from a toy store, or even Den Den Town. I saw this in the Village Vanguard, a hipster bookstore in Amerika Mura (America Village). They were selling some kind of G.I. Joe knock-off and this was their display case. Very creative way of marketing otherwise dull historical action figures: "Kids! Get your own bondage/mutual masturbation at gunpoint playset! While supplies last!"

Back on the Market

It's been about two months since I quit my job with NOVA and I've certainly been happy living the jobless life. Unfortunately, the current trickle of income is not enough to quench my monetary thirst and I'm burning through my savings. So, I have begrudgingly dug the suit out of the closet and begun sending out resumes.

I've had a few responses and even an interview already, but nothing too promising. The job I interviewed for was offering about $20/hr at most, but more likely to be $15/hr. The commute is kinda far and they didn't say if travel expenses are covered either. I'm thinking I'll hold out for something better, as a teacher with my experience and willingness to teach kids usually makes about $25-$30/hr plus travel.

Wearing a suit again sure does suck. Thank god the jobs I'm applying for don't require it. Since I'll probably be at small private schools, working with kids most of the time, I won't have to wear a suit or even a shirt and tie. One of my biggest complaints about NOVA was the dress code: slacks, buttoned shirt, tie, dress shoes. Getting dressed in the morning took forever and playing with kids in those clothes was brutal. Give me a T-shirt and jeans or give me death!